23narchy in the UK

Think for yourself; question authority. 
Filed under

humour

 

How To Report The News | Charlie Brooker

Loading mentions Retweet
Filed under  //   humour   news   TV  

Comments [0]

Why It's Better To Pretend You Don't Know Anything About Computers | The Oatmeal

view the complete article at theoatmeal.com

So true...

Loading mentions Retweet
Filed under  //   computing   humour   technology  

Comments [0]

The iPad keynote video - Peter Serafinowicz style

Loading mentions Retweet
Filed under  //   Apple   humour   iPad   serafinowicz  

Comments [0]

Airbrushed for Change | MyDavidCameron.com

Loading mentions Retweet
Filed under  //   conservative   david cameron   humour   photoshop   politics   propaganda   tory   uk  

Comments [0]

Floor caves in at Weight Watchers meeting | Yahoo!Xtra News

Yahoo!Xtra January 15, 2010, 12:12 pm

Floor caves in at Weight Watchers meeting

The floor beneath the feet of some 20 Weight Watchers members collapsed at a clinic in Sweden.

The participants in the fat-loss programme had gathered for a weigh-in in the town of Växjö on Wednesday night.

However the numbers on the scales weren't the only thing dropping.

"We suddenly heard a huge thud; we almost thought it was an earthquake and everything flew up in the air," one told the Smalandsposten newspaper. "The floor collapsed in one corner of the room and along the walls."

No one was injured in the incident, and the meeting concluded in another room.

But the damaged floor has spelled the end for the clinic's current building.

"We're going to have to find a replacement premises," Weight Watchers consultant Therese Levin told the paper.

 

Loading mentions Retweet
Filed under  //   chance   coincidence   humour   weight loss  

Comments [0]

Locations of Ancient Woolworths Stores follow Precise Geometric Patterns


Press Release – FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

5 January 2010

Locations of Ancient Woolworths Stores follow Precise Geometrical Pattern

Matt Parker, based in the School of Mathematical Sciences at Queen Mary, University of London, has analysed the locations of the 800 Woolworths stores to reveal precise geometric patterns. This was based on the work of Mr Tom Brooks (a retired marketing executive of Honiton, Devon) who found similar patterns in prehistoric monuments across the UK.

Mr Brooks looked at 1500 sites and found that some of them follow geometric patterns and he concluded that they must have been part of a sophisticated navigational system. This was reported in the UK national press on 5 January 2010, with the Daily Mail reporting that the patterns were so “sophisticated and accurate” that “he does not rule out extraterrestrial help.”

Matt Parker then decided to apply this technique to another ancient and mysterious civilisation: that of the Woolworths stores.

“We know so little about the ancient Woolworth stores, but we do still know their locations” explains Matt Parker, “so I thought that if we analysed the sites we could learn more about what life was like in 2008 and how these people went about buying cheap kitchen accessories and discount CDs.”

The results revealed an exact and precise geometric placement of the Woolworths locations. Three stores around Birmingham formed an exact equilateral triangle (Wolverhampton, Lichfield and Birmingham stores) and if the base of the triangle is extended, it forms a 173.8 mile line linking the Conwy and Luton stores. Despite the 173.8 mile distance involved, the Conway Woolworths store is only 40 feet off the exact line and the Luton site is within 30 feet.  All four stores align with an accuracy of 0.05%.

The bisector of this same triangle then passes through the Monmouth, West Bromwich and Alfreton store locations with an accuracy of 0.5%. There are also grids of isosceles triangles – those with two sides of equal length – on each side of the Birmingham Woolworths Triangle. One such isosceles triangle made with Stafford only has an error of 3% and it points directly at the Northwich Woolworths store that is itself only 0.6% off being exactly isosceles.

Matt Parker concludes that “these incredibly precise geometric patterns mean that the people who founded the Woolworths Empire must have used these store locations as a form of ‘landmark satnav’ to help hunters find their nearest source of cheap sweets that can be purchased in whatever mix they chose to pick. Well, that or the fact that in any sufficiently large set of random data it is possible to find meaningless patterns of any required accuracy.”

These patterns were found from the 800 random ex-Woolworth locations by simply skipping over the vast majority of the sites and only choosing the few that happen to line-up. Matt Parker claims he could find many more such patterns, but he had some actual real work to do. He does envy Mr Tom Brooks though, who with 1500 locations, had almost twice as much data to pull meaningless patterns from.

 “It is extremely important to look at how much data people are using to support an argument” Matt Parker warned. “For example, the case for global warming covers vast amounts of comprehensive evidence, but it is still possible for people to search through the data and find a few isolated examples that appear to show otherwise.”

Map showing locations and patterns:

ENDS

Notes for Editors


Contact Matt Parker for high resolution images and for versions without Google Maps copyright. All location data and calculations are also available.

Contact:

Matt Parker

matt@standupmaths.com

Ph. (+44) 7962 466288

Original media coverage of Mr Tom Brooks’ findings:

 

http://www.metro.co.uk/news/807855-did-prehistoric-satnav-help-britons-find-their-way

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1213400/Ancient-man-used-stone-sat-nav-navigate-country.html

Loading mentions Retweet
Filed under  //   bad science   humour   maths   science   woolworths  

Comments [0]

Airbrushed for change | mydavidcameron.com

Check out the link for lots more remixed Cameron posters.

Loading mentions Retweet
Filed under  //   conservative   humour   politics   tory   uk  

Comments [0]

Snowfall - Hitler misses out on the snow

Loading mentions Retweet
Filed under  //   Adolf Hitler   downfall   extreme weather   humour   parody   snow   video  

Comments [0]

Gnome Chomsky The Garden Noam | Dangerous Minds

12.07.2009 12:45 pm

image
 
And why not combine political dissent with yard ornamentation?

Standing at just under 17inches, Gnome Chomsky the Garden Noam clutches his classic books, ‘The Manufacture of Compost’ and ‘Hedgerows not Hegemony’ – with his open right hand ready to hold the political slogan of your choosing.  His clothes represent a relaxed but classy version of regular gnome attire, including: a nice suit jacket-tunic, jeans, boots, traditional gnome cap, and glasses.  Additionally, Noam Gnome stands on a base complete with a carved title – for anyone who may not immediately realize the identity of this handsome and scholarly gnome. 

Gnome Chomsky comes painted (above) for $155.00.  You can order him unpainted, though, for only $57.00.

(via JustSayGnome)

 

Loading mentions Retweet
Filed under  //   garden gnome   humour   linguistics   noam chomsky   politics  

Comments [0]

African leaders advise Bono on reform of U2

By William Easterly |

 

Bono_Mandela

Bono thanks Commission chairman Nelson Mandela for the Report


An expert commission of African leaders today announced their plan for comprehensive reform of music band U2. Saying that U2’s rock had lost touch with its African roots, the commission called for urgent measures to halt U2’s slide towards impending crisis.

“Our youth today are imperiled by low quality music,” said Commission chairman Nelson Mandela. “We will be lending African musicians to U2 to try to refurbish their sound to satisfy the urgent and growing needs for diversionary entertainment at a time of crisis in the global music and financial sectors.”

Concerns about U2 have been growing in Africa for a while. One Western aid blogger testified to the Commission that his teenage kids found U2’s music “cheesy.” The Mandela Commission proposed that U2 follow a series of steps to recover its Edge:

1) Hire African consultants to analyze U2’s “poverty of music trap”

2) Prepare a Band-owned and Commission-approved Comprehensive U2 Reform Strategy Design (CURSD)

3) Undertake a rehabilitation tour of African capitals to field-test and ground-truth proposed reforms

4) Subject all songs to randomized experiments in which the effect on wellbeing of control and treatment groups is rigorously assessed.

Mandela expressed optimism that the Commission’s report and proposed reforms had come in time to stave off terminal crisis in U2, and restore its effectiveness in the 80s arena rock field.Google Bookmarks

 

Loading mentions Retweet
Filed under  //   humour   music   pomposity  

Comments [0]